3 things to say loudly in public to embarrass a friend…

When I was living in Wellingborough in 1996 writing a radio script (which never saw the light of day but which put wheels in motion and to which I probably owe my career) my friend Nick and I would traipse out at lunchtime to the Swansgate centre, past the crazy dancing lady, to Tesco, to get our lunch. We’d come back, eat it, watch Neighbours, and then Call My Bluff, then carry on working until 6. We were fairly sure that the people of the town thought we were a gay couple and to annoy Nick I used to say things loudly in public to embarrass him. Now you can enjoy the benefit of these hissed gems.

1. No I will not be quiet!

2. I hope you’re not going to be like this tonight!

3. Why are you punishing me? Because I’m not HIM?

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One thought on “3 things to say loudly in public to embarrass a friend…

  1. Ah the dark ages in the east midlands. I will also forever treasure the memory of when we were walking back from yet another miserable “we’re not a gay couple, honest” trip to Tesco’s and we spotted a couple of nice young ladies walking towards us. You said “Act butch” and a split-second later put your foot off the curb, threw your shopping bags in the air and screamed in camp agony, while I flapped round you like a mother hen going “Oh god, are you alright? Speak to me, Dan!”

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